victoria’s birth story

My birth experience is something I will always look back on as such a positive and memorable experience; I now tell everyone I had a “dream birth”. Every time I think about it, it brings me so much happiness and overwhelming joy and I owe it all to the amazing help of my doulas, Sarah and Katie.

My entire life I was so terrified of labor that I thought I may never have kids because of it. When I found out I was pregnant I was so excited but also extremely scared. I had so many panic attacks and would just stress about what it was going to be like. One day my fiancée and I decided we needed to seek a doula to help guide us through the process since we were so nervous and neither of us knew what to expect. I am so incredibly lucky I found Sarah and Katie!!! When they met us for our prenatal visit they brought me a gift bag with things to help me prepare for labor, it was so thoughtful!! They also provided links and suggestions for so many helpful things such as a car seat class, prenatal yoga classes, chiropractors and postpartum resources. They spent so much time addressing all of our questions and concerns and helping me make a birth plan. By the time they left, my fiance and I felt so much more prepared and confident about what to expect. It was such a relief; we were actually getting somewhat excited for the experience!

I went into labor at Sears, or at least that's when my contractions started. I went to try out a patio set and the second I sat down I said “wow, that doesn’t feel good…”. Sam and his mom thought I was talking about the patio chair but in reality I had started my contractions. We bought the stroller we came for and headed home. The contractions were mild and far apart so I went about my night. I made steak salad and the SECOND I sat down to eat my dinner my water broke. I thought to myself “seriously?? I am hungry I wanted to eat this salad!” LOL. I decided I was just going to shove the salad in my mouth as fast as possible before we went to the hospital. Once I was done I grabbed my hospital bag and we hit the road. When I first got to the hospital the nurse put me in a triage room and said they had to take a sample of my water to make sure it was actually my water that broke. They also had to check how dilated I was. Before they checked, my contractions were very mild and I wasn’t in much pain. The second she checked my cervix the pain became so intense and the contractions felt way worse. Sam and I were both nervous about what we were about to go through. They confirmed my water had broke and put me in a room.

My contractions were already so bad I was kind of panicking and wanted to get an epidural at only 2cm, they went to get the anesthesiologist to come talk to me. My goal was to do an all natural birth so I was very upset about wanting to get it so soon. Sarah and Katie came into the room, they encouraged me and reassured me and immediately helped me realize I could do this. Jessica my amazing and sweet midwife came in shortly after and also talked to me and told me she knew I could do this and she knew I wanted an all natural birth so I should at least try to hold on a little longer to see if I could make it through the initial pain. They all made me feel so much better and more confident. I could tell Sam felt a lot better too and he immediately changed his mindset to “we can do this” and started to encourage me and cheer me on. Sarah and Katie jumped into action, they set up candles all over the room and dimmed the lights and created a very relaxing atmosphere. They set up an oil diffuser with really calming essential oils and put on an extremely relaxing playlist with lots of Nora Jones.

Sam's mom Esther came into the room to see how I was doing. Originally I didn’t want anyone from our families other than Sam to be there, but I thought about what an incredible life experience this was going to be and how no matter what happened I wanted her to be there to experience it too. She was so grateful that I wanted her to be there during this. Lindsey, my nurse came in and introduced herself, she was so extremely sweet as well. Between Sarah, Katie, Jessica, Lindsey, Esther and Sam I thought to myself, “I have the most amazing team of people to support me through this, I couldn’t be more lucky.” I just remember feeling overwhelmed with gratitude to be surrounded by such amazing and kind people who were all trying to provide the best experience for me and make sure I felt supported.

Sarah and Katie drew a warm bath for me to sit in to help with the pain from the contractions, the second I got in the pain got so much better, it helped take the pain from the contractions down so much. I was splashing the warm water on my stomach and breathing deeply. I sat and labored in the bath for quite some time and it really eased my pain and helped me get through so many contractions. The worst pain for me was when I had to get up to use the bathroom, the pain was so bad when I was out of the water and when I had to walk around and not be in a comfortable position. I got back in the tub and the pain again got better. Sam was so sweet and sat with me, telling me how strong I was and how proud of me he was, I felt so happy that we were about to meet our baby girl.

Eventually Lindsey had to have me get out so they could check vitals and monitor the baby. I was upset I had to get out because the pain was so so much worse when I was out of the water. Sarah immediately got a medicine ball and helped me get into a position that relieved a lot of pain and helped me stay upright to help the labor progress. Sarah and Katie started helping me get into a good rhythm of what felt comfortable for me and helped me make it through my contractions. Sarah was having me close my eyes and envision a wave crashing against the shore. It was very relaxing for me to think about and took me back to when Sam and I used to watch the waves crash against the shore at Bakers Beach in San Francisco where we are from. Katie was helping me count down from 10 which helped me because I knew as we got closer to 1, the closer I was to being done with that contraction and through the wave of pain.

The pain was getting more intense and there were a few times when I didn’t know if I could handle the pain any longer, Sarah and Katie reassured me that if I could just make it through another contraction or two then I might be able to keep going. This was amazing because when I would push through for a little longer, it would somehow get past it and be able to keep going and persist through the pain. Sam helped with counter pressure (Sarah and Katie showed him how to do it when they came over for my prenatal visit). He let me lean on him with my arms around his neck as he pushed on my lower back, it provided so much relief and it really helped me to be able to manage the pain. I just remember feeling so grateful for Sam and how much he was helping me and just being there for me through this experience.

Sarah and Katie also massaged my back which provided extreme relief for me. It took the pain down so much and made it much more manageable! I made it through a few more hours, finally once I got past 6 cm the contractions were coming so much faster and I was so exhausted from my lack of sleep, I just didn’t have the energy to handle it anymore. It felt like they were coming so fast, I didn’t have any time in between to catch a breath and relax for a minute, it seemed relentless! I broke down and asked for an epidural. I felt defeated because I wanted so badly to push through and go all natural. Sarah and Katie reassured me that I had done an amazing job and had made it so far. They said I should be proud of myself for even making it so far (especially when I was already asking for the epidural at 2cm). They told me if I felt I needed it then that was perfectly okay and they were there to support my decision no matter what I wanted to do. I really needed to hear that, it made me feel so much better in my decision and took away the negativity I was feeling surrounding the epidural.

Once I got it I was actually able to sleep and get some much needed rest so I had energy when it came time to push. Sarah and Katie were so sweet and told my (exhausted) fiancee that he could sleep too while I slept and she would be there for me just in case I woke up. When I woke up Sarah and Katie gave me a foot massage which had to be one of the most amazing things ever!! It made me feel so good and relaxed. When the time came to push I was very scared and nervous. I had let the epidural wear off a bit and didn’t hit the button for more so I would be able to feel when to push. I was nervous about the pain and if she would come out without any issues or complications. Esther came over and prayed with me and made me feel so much better. Sarah and Katie gave me so many words of encouragement. They also put on a motivational playlist of songs I had previously selected that all were special to Sam and I. I am so glad they had me make that playlist because it was honestly the most special thing about the entire experience. The songs were all so special to us and brought back so many amazing memories throughout our relationship. Listening to them overwhelmed me with happiness thinking about how much I love Sam and how I was about to bring our child that we made together into the world. I was overcome with love and I just couldn’t believe after 9 months of waiting she was almost here!

It finally came time and they told me to push when the contractions would come, to hold my breath and give 3 long pushes. I channeled all of my energy and force to push as hard as I could. Getting her past the pubic bone was the hardest part but once I did I knew I was in the home stretch. Through the entire thing Sam and I were just staring into each other's eyes, completely overflowing with love for each other. Then Jessica said her head was already showing and asked me if I wanted to feel. I said yes and reached down and felt the top of her little head with what felt like a full head of hair. This moment was one I will never ever forget in my entire life. After having her in my belly for so long and just wanting to touch and hold her, feeling her part way into the world I was hit with a wave of the most incredible love!!! I vividly remember saying “I love you little girl! Don’t worry momma’s going to get you out right now!” I ended up only needing to push for 35 minutes before Violet arrived! They put her on my chest immediately and it was just the most insane moment of my life, I almost feel like I had a black-out moment, kind of like my brain couldn’t process what was happening because it was so unbelievable and incredible. Sarah and Katie captured photos all throughout the night, and they actually captured a video of that exact moment. I couldn’t be more grateful because even though that moment is so blurry in my memory, I can rewatch it whenever I want and relive the moment. The photos from the night are the most special photos I have and they bring me overwhelming joy when I look back at them.

I was only in the hospital for 24 hours after giving birth and it seemed like a crash course of everything you could possibly fit in that time on what to do and how to take care of your new baby; all while you are so exhausted you can barely stay awake. After going home with Violet there were so many new things and questions that arose. Sarah and Katie met with me twice for postnatal follow ups and helped answer so many of my questions including those about breastfeeding... which ended up being a lot harder than I had anticipated. It was so exhausting to wake up every 2 hours on the dot all throughout the night to feed her too. Sarah was so thoughtful, the second postnatal visit she made an amazing food dish for my fiance I, and Katie brought us breatmilk tea. We were both so exhausted from the lack of sleep and preparing food for ourselves had completely gone out the window, so it was such a blessing!! She is truly such a thoughtful person. Sarah and Katie got to hold Violet and it was such an amazing moment seeing them hold her. These incredible women empowered me and helped me to be the strongest I’ve ever been through the most difficult thing I have ever done, seeing them with Violet brought me so much joy. Overall I had such an amazing, uplifting and positive birth experience; it was the best case scenario I could have possibly imagined! I will forever cherish the memory of that day, the best day of my life!